Tombstone Blues !

Having been forced into writing a Will just recently one finds oneself having to decide wether to be cremated or buried. Personally I want to be buried. I don't fancy coming round from a coma just as I go into the incinerator. Nope, at least if I come round underground I can do an Uma Therman in Kill Bill 2. But it also got me thinking about what to put on the old headstone. There's the Black Adder version,

"Here lies Old Growler and he's bloody annoyed."

A friend and work collegue did that one about 12 years ago, except the vicar wouldn't allow the word bloody.It had to be "Very Annoyed" which didn't have quite the same ring to it. I also like the Spike Milligan one,

"I told you I wasn't feeling well".

Or I could use,
"I needed a bloody good lie in.!"

maybe,
"Lived fast, died young and left a good looking corpse.""Dig me up and have a look."

or if by some miracle I live to old age,
"Only the good die young.!"

or
"Now i'm really pissed off.!"

or
"Do you mind if I don't get up.?"

or
"I said my feet were killing me.!"

or
"Died owing more than when I arrived"

or
"I told you the prawns were off!"

or
"What was the bloody point.!"

or
"That's the last time I drink ten Rocky Mountain Bear Fuckers.!"

or
"Rot In Peace"

I'd better stop now or it'll be,

"Died laughing"